With your food stamps, buy enough twinkies for your family.

You will need some used popcicle sticks or clean twigs.

Bowl of buttermilk
Bowl of unsalted cracker meal
Bowl of flour

First you have to freeze the twinkies. Once they freeze over, start to heat up your favorite oil to about 350 degrees. I use Goya lard because all the added saturated fat just adds more flavor. Next stick popcicle sticks or clean twigs into the ends of your frozen twinkies. Holding the twinkies by the stick, dip them one by one in your bowl of flour. Then one by one dip into the buttermilk. Finally the cracker meal. Dunk each Twinkie into the hot oil, holding it by the stck of course. Try not to be wearing your favorite tuxedo or silk shirt because the oil is going to be rocking and rolling with instanilty. Some about deep frying twinkies does this. Anyway, let each Twinkie fry for five to seven minutes. Until golden brown and crispy.