***Dressing:***
1/2 cup oil
1/4 cup vinegar
1 tablespoon sugar
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon pepper
seasoning package from noodles

Combine ramen
noodles, cabbage and onions. Make dressing by combining all
ingredients; shake well. Toss with Salad

Mix ingredients together, and mop hog every other hr.

I cook the chicken in oil garlic and butter, and then put to the side. I then melt 2 tablespoons of better in the pan over low heat (I do not let it
brown) and add 2 big scoops of flour (also, not let to brown). I work in the rest of the butter and cream then add the cheese and the seasonings.
Then I combine the chicken with the peppers, onions, garlic and lime. I simmer low then cook and add the pasta.

1 pound of bacon
4 cloves of garlic, minced
1 whole sliver of onion
1 chipotle en adobo
2 teaspoons adobo sauce (from the can)
2 teaspoons cumin
1/2 teaspoon chili powder
1/2 teaspoon cocoa powder
1 cup of brewed coffee
1/4 cup apple cider vinegar
Black pepper to taste

I cut the bacon into small pieces and cooked it with the garlic, onion, and all the other spices until everything was done, but soft. I did not drain the grease. Then I pureed everything together until it had a smoothie consistency. It’s awesome on top of pork chops or scrambled eggs. Below is the original recipe.

http://homesicktexan.blogspot.com/2009/09/bacon-jam-recipe-make-it-at-home.html

You’ll need:
A whole chicken.
A can of beer. I use Natural Ice.
Salt & Pepper
Bit of oil

Butcher a chicken and let it sit in the fridge for three days to settle. In three days, take the chicken out of the fridge and let it sit til it gets to room temp. Crack open a 32 oz. can of your favorite beer and go start up the grill. Don’t drink that whole beer, only drink about one third of it. Now back to the kitchen to rub a little oil all over the whole chicken. Quit drinking that beer! Then salt and pepper the hell out of your bird. Now stuff your fist in the orifice of the chicken and kind of stretch it out a bit. Loosen it up. OK now you can take one more sip of that beer. Now with your chicken in one hand, and your beer in the other, sit that chicken on top of the can and shove it on there til it can’t go on any deeper. If it’s a bit off balance, just tie the legs around the can until it will sit upright nice and properly. Your grill should be hot by now so take the by now so walk the bird to the grill and set it UPRIGHT on the grill. Close the lid and let it cook for a couple of hours checking on it every now and again. When the legs look like they are going to fall off, it’s done. Get some sort of tool or utensil to get the bird onto a plate. Eat it upright or flop it over on it’s side. All the beer should have absorbed into the bird. Enjoy!

Freeze a stick of butter.
Flour
1 egg
Panko crumbs or if your heart can take it, use crushed up Ritz crackers.
Pan with 2 inches of vegetable oil or if your colon can handle it, use lard. It’s better.

First, cut the frozen butter into pats. There’s lines on the butter wrapper, use those as a guide. Take the egg and make egg wash with it. Dip the pats into flour first. Then dip them individually into the egg wash. Then coat the pats with the Panko or your breading of choice. Put them on a cookie sheet and freeze for about ten minutes and start heating up your oil. Once the oil is nice and hot, about 350 degrees, drop the pats in. Don’t be constantly stirring them, it will mess them up. Just fry on one side for a minute and turn them over gently with a fork and get the other side. Once done, place them on a paper towel to drain all that excess oil off. You know, because you don’t wanna have to much grease on your deep fried butter pats. Enjoy!

This recipe may cause severe coronary heart disease, blocked arteries, above normal levels of cholesteral, birth defects, clogged colon, sphincter tares, cardiovascular malfunction, and bleeding in the gastrointestinal tract.

In skillet, brown beef; drain. Stir in soups. Pour into a greased 13×9x2
inch baking dish. Arrange french fries on top. Bake, uncovered, at 350, 50-55
minutes until fries are golden brown.

Divide crackers between two ungreased 13 x 9 inch baking dishes. Top with
rice. In a skillet, cook beef and onion until meat is no longer pink.
Drain. Add tomato juice, water and seasonings and simmer for 15 to 20 minutes.
Spoon over rice. Sprinkle with lettuce and tomatoes
In a saucepan, melt butter. Stir in flour until smooth. Gradually add
milk. Bring to a boil and cook and stir for 2 minutes. Reduce heat and stir in
American cheese until melted. Pour over the tomatoes. Top with cheddar
cheese and olives. Serve with chips. Refrigerate any leftovers.

13” baking dish. Slice potatoes and lay over beef. Mix milk and soup
together. Pour over potatoes. Pour cheese over top. Bake at 350 degrees for

50 – 60 minutes.
This is a recipe I prepare often. Easy to prepare, simple ingredients and
and very tasty.

Heat oven to 450 degrees. Butter 12 muffin cups or corn stick pans.

Beat eggs. Beat in rest of ingredients just until smooth. Pour into
hot pans until almost full. Bake 10-15 minutes.

Mix mushroom soup and Cheez Whiz in small bowl and set aside. Place hominy,
pepper and onion in small greased casserole dish; pour soup mixture over top.
Sprinkle with crushed corn chips. Bake at 350 degrees for 30 minutes. Yield:
6 servings

Cook and drain the ground beef. Combine all the remaining ingredients
in a large stockpot. Bring to a boil, add the meat, and hold the boil
for 20 minutes.

In a large skillet, cook and stir hot dogs in 1 tablespoon of the
butter over medium-high heat until lightly browned. Remove from
skillet and keep warm.

In the same skillet, saute the onions, celery, green pepper and
garlic in remaining butter until tender. Add the tomatoes, oregano,
paprika, pepper and hot dogs. Cook and stir until heated
through. Serve over noodles or rice.

Prepare biscuit according to package directions. In a large skillet
over medium-heat, saute Spam and onion in butter until Spam is lightly
browned.

Stir in flour and pepper. Cook 1 minute, stirring constantly. Stir in
milk.

Cook, stirring occasionally, until mixture just comes to a boil.
Reduce heat to medium. Cook, stirring occasionally, until gravy is
thickened.

Serve over hot biscuits.

2 tbs butter or margarine- melted
1/2 c buttermilk (or plain yogurt) or milk with 1 tsp vinegar added
1/4 tsp garlic powder
1 tsp parsley dried, add more if using fresh
1/2 tsp basil
1/2 cup flour
1 tsp baking powder
preheat oven to 375 degrees
spray 4 cups of a muffin tin including top with cooking spray (or oil well)

Break ramen into 4 pieces
Put with packet of soup base into a bowl and soak for 5 minutes
DRAIN VERY WELL

whisk all other ingredients together

put about 1 tbs of batter into each cup, top with softned, noodles and finish with remaining batter
bake until golden about 15 minutes- eat hot

Boil and mash potato ’till its free from lumps. Sift flour, salt and baking powder. Add potato and rub in shortening. Mix to a light dough with the egg and milk, roll out a little thinner than ordinary biscuit; bake in a hot oven(425 degrees) for 10-15 minutes until brown. Serve as soon as they are done.

Mix corn & beef. Put mashed potatoes in center of plate. Cover with the beef/corn mixture. Smother with ketchup. Add salt & pepper to taste. Enjoy!*

Add the onion to the hamburger and brown. In a large pot, put all the ingredients
together. Simmer for 30 minutes.

First take one properly flattened skunk and skin it. Then roll it in a mixture of corn meal, flour, sage, black pepper, salt, and onion powder. Then gently place it in a vat of hot oil and fry it for about eight minutes and serve it with French fried Jalopenos. And for dessert, chilled third grader.

Wash frog legs thoroughly. Place in a large Dutch oven; sprinkle with lemon juice, and cover with crushed ice. Refrigerate 1 to 3 hours.

Make a super supplementing Orovo like batter by combining milk, egg yolks, olive oil, sugar and 1/4 tsp. salt; mix well. Beat egg whites until stiff; fold into batter.

Sprinkle frog legs with salt and pepper; dip each in batter, and dredge in flour. Fry until golden brown in deep oil heated to 375 degrees F. Drain on paper towels.

Score the balogna by cutting diagonal lines 1/8 inch deep to from a
diamond pattern. Stud each diamond with a whole clove. Insert balogna
on a spit rod through center of roll and cook 5 inches from coals
basting frequently with sauce made from the above ingredients. Takes
about 30 minutes to be heated through.Remove from rod and slice and
serve. serves 10 to 12. Accompany with things such as diet pills, potato salad,
baked beans etc.

First you need a handfull of moss. Wet or dried is fine.
Then you will need a pot of hot or boiling water.
Only certain spices go good with moss. Things like pepper, tons of salt, a beef or chicken boullion cube or five, a few dashes of Tobasco or other favorite hot sauce, and of course garlic. If the moss is dried then boil it for at least thirty minutes to sanitize and soften it up. If it’s a moist type then just bring to a boil with the spices. Add all the spices right when it boils then turn off the heat. Let the concoction steep for about another half hour before serving it. I like to eat my moss soup with real stale bread. By stale I mean almost breaking a tooth. Or if you have croutons throw them in there upon serving. Enjoy!

On a rack over a baking pan, I lay the bacon out flat, single layer, not touching.
About 45 minutes at 250F leaves behind a pan full of bacon fat and strips of bacon
that feel like pig-flavored wisps; very light. The strips have had virtually all
the fat rendered. Next, out of the oven and pour off the fat (to save for another
day). Loosen the strips from the rack (if necessary) and either pile with brown
sugar or trickle a generous amount of honey along their lengths. Back into the oven
to let the sweetness melt into the bacon. Maybe 1/2 hour this time. It’s now
*inside* the bacon. An awesome snack. You don’t want to drop any of this on your office furniture or nice leather couch. It is so greasy it will leave a stain only a professional can remove. Enjoy!

SPREAD the mayo and hot/mild Taco Bell sauce on the tortilla. Top that with your piece of lettuce. On that add a slice of bologna and a hunk of cheese. Roll up the tortilla and place on a plate. Make as many as you need then place on tv stands and invite all your friends over to watch the “Dukes of Hazard”. Serve with Natural Ice beer. Enjoy!

I bought me a house in NC and this recipe goes wit typical Wilmington NC real estate cooking ethics. I was amazed. Anyway, first off cook ya some pasta. Scramble some eggs with the onion, taters, and sliced weiners until well done, almost burnt. Eventually add the cheese and cooked pasta on top. White trash meal at its finest. Garnish with crushed crackers and anything green you need to get rid of. Enjoy!

8 – 15 lb. Turkey
1 cup melted butter
1 cup stuffing (Pepperidge Farm is Good.)
1/2 cup or more to taste green or red sasla.
if you want to make it hotter add chipote peppers to taste
1 cup uncooked popcorn (ORVILLE REDENBACHER’S LOW FAT) Salt/pepper to taste

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Brush turkey well with melted butter salt,
and pepper. Fill cavity with stuffing and popcorn. Place in baking pan
with the neck end toward the back of the oven.
Listen for the popping sounds. When the turkey’s ass blows the oven door
open and the bird flies across the room, it’s done.

Collect candy canes.
Put then in a cup with ice.
Fill the cup up with milk.

Now get a beer coaster and cover the cup tightly and shake vigorously. That’s all there is to it. If it’s available, use snow for a more dramatic white trash effect. Enjoy.

You will need some used popcicle sticks or clean twigs.

Bowl of buttermilk
Bowl of unsalted cracker meal
Bowl of flour

First you have to freeze the twinkies. Once they freeze over, start to heat up your favorite oil to about 350 degrees. I use Goya lard because all the added saturated fat just adds more flavor. Next stick popcicle sticks or clean twigs into the ends of your frozen twinkies. Holding the twinkies by the stick, dip them one by one in your bowl of flour. Then one by one dip into the buttermilk. Finally the cracker meal. Dunk each Twinkie into the hot oil, holding it by the stck of course. Try not to be wearing your favorite tuxedo or silk shirt because the oil is going to be rocking and rolling with instanilty. Some about deep frying twinkies does this. Anyway, let each Twinkie fry for five to seven minutes. Until golden brown and crispy.

4 large Squirrel
7 slices bacon
1 cup Barfield Barbecue Sauce
water as needed

Put 4 slices of fat bacon in a large black iron Dutch oven.
Lay the squirrels on top of them and lay 3 slices of bacon on the top of the squirrel.
Add with Barfield Barbecue Sauce and cover.
Put them in the oven at 350F and let them cook until done.
Add a little water if needed to keep from burning.
Serve hot with some barbecue sauce on the side.

Barfield Barbecue Sauce

2 1/2 cups Worcestershire sauce
6 oz. water
1 med. onion
2 1/2 Cups ketchup
1/8 Cup sugar
1/4 cup dark molasses
1/2 Cup apple cider
4 Tbsp barbecue seasoning mix*
1/2 Cup prepared mustard.

Mix all ingredients in saucepan.
Simmer for 20 minutes.
Keeps well in the refrigerator for 2-3 months.

*Barbecue Seasoning Mix

6 Tbsp Salt
6 Tbsp course ground black pepper
3 tsp. ground cayenne pepper
6 Tbsp dark chili powder
12 Tbsp Paprika
6 Tbsp ground Cumin
12 Tbsp granulated Sugar

Combine all ingredients, mix thoroughly.
Place in jar with tight fitting lid, use as desired.

1/2 cup milk
14 oz. can sweetened condensed milk
3 lg. eggs
1/4 tsp. salt
1 cup sugar
1 Tbsp vanilla
2 gallons (or more) very fresh, light fluffy snow (no yellow snow)

Put milk, sweetened condensed milk, eggs and salt in saucepan. Mix
with a wire whisk until smooth. Cook over medium heat, stirring
constantly with the whisk until the mixture just begins to boil. Remove
from heat and add sugar and vanilla. Cover and let cool in the
refrigerator. When the mixture is about room temperature, pour it into
a large mixing bowl. Add 1 quart of snow and mix. Continue adding more
snow until the mixture is very thick and looks like ice cream. Be
careful not to add to much snow. Serve right away. 8-10 servings.

1 cup milk
1/2 cup sugar
scant 1/2 teaspoon vanilla
large bowl of snow (about 3 quarts)

Blend milk, sugar and vanilla. Stir in enough snow to make snow cream to an ice cream consistency.

Variations – There are many variations for snow cream. For example,
substitute canned cream for milk for a heavier flavor. Add Nestles
Quik
for a chocolate snow cream, or use instant cocoa mix. Another variation is to add plump raisins and cinnamon, or add a beaten egg for a nog taste. Puree an overripe banana and add to the mixture. Get creative – you know your family’s tastes.

Prepare dough by mixing sugar with shortening and salt. Add egg and beat
with mixer one minute
until well blended. Dissolve yeast in warm milk. Add flour, then
milk-yeast mixture and vanilla to
dough batter. Mix three minutes with dough hook or by hand. Turn dough
onto floured board; knead
one minute. Place in a lightly greased bowl, cover with a towel and set
in a warm place to rise for
one hour or until doubled. Meanwhile, prepare topping; set aside.

Divide dough in two pieces. Roll or pat to fit two well-greased 8″
square pans or one 9×13X2″ pan.
Crimp edges halfway up sides of pan to hold topping in. When dought is
spread, prick dough with
fork to prevent bubbling. Divide topping; spread over dough. Let cakes
stand 20 minutes. Bake at
375°F for 30 minutes or until done. Do not overbake. Topping should be
crusty, but gooey. Let
cool before cutting.

Butter Cake Topping

1/2 pound (2 sticks) unsalted butter NO SUBSTITUTES
2/3 cup flour
2 cups EXTRA FINE sugar
2 extra large eggs
4 to 5 tablespoons milk

Cream butter. Stir together flour and sugar. Gradually beat sugar
mixture in butter. Add eggs, one at
a time, beating well after each addition. By the teaspoonful, add just
enough milk to bring mixture to
a consistency for easy spreading over the cake, being careful not to
make it too runny. Use as
directed in recipe for Butter Cake.
After eating this cake you will want to get the best diet pill you can find. The calorie count of this dessert is through the roof.

3 Hard boiled eggs; chopped
2 ts Mustard
8 Hot dog buns
1/4 c Chili sauce
8 Weiners; cut in small pieces
1 c Ketchup; about
1/2 c Old cheddar cheese; shredded

Instructions for Franks in Foil
Mix all ingredients except buns. Adjust consistency with ketchup; should not be runny. Place equal amounts in hot dog buns and wrap in foil. Heat in oven at 350 F until warmed through. Makes 8 servings.

Combine the chiles, onion, garlic, papaya, and tomato in a food
processor and puree (you may have to do this in batches). Remove to a
shallow bowl. Combine the vinegar, lime juice, and water in a saucepan
and heat until it reaches a slight boil, then sprinkle the thyme,
basil, nutmeg, mustard, and turmeric. Pour this hot, spiced mixture
over the reserved puree and mix thoroughly. It will last up to eight
weeks in the refrigerator.

Mix everything in a large, heavy saucepan. Add water as needed to create a
sauce with a cream-like texture. Bring to a boil, stirring constantly.
Reduce heat, partially cover and simmer VERY GENTLY for 1 hour. Stir
frequently. Add water if it gets too thick. This sauce freezes well in
mason jars. Use as a base flavoring for chili, sloppy joes, dip for wings
or barbecue sauce. It is easily modified to accommodate individual heat
preferences.

Grind the habaneros (with seeds) in a food processor. Add other
ingredients
and puree.
Serving Ideas : Use to marinate chicken wings.

In stock pot add Habaneros, water and salt. Slow boil for 15 minuets. then
drain, saving 3/4 cup of water. Puree in blender the saved water and all
ingredients except vinegar. Return to stock pot and simmer on medium low
heat for 10 minutes, stirring constantly. Remove from heat and stir in
vinegar till slightly cooled. Keeps in refrigerator 4 months or can and
process. Refrigerate after opening. Serving Ideas: Sweetly Hot and Spicy
ideal for chicken, pork or fish.

Ingredients:
Hot peppers of your choice
Distilled or cider vinegar

Yeap that’s it. Now you’ll want to git the peppers. Take all the seeds out and bite off the stem. Cut your peppers into halves and place them in a glass container with a lid. Do not use metal or plastic. The metal will react with the acid and the plastic will melt. Cover with the vinegar to
about 1″ above the top of peppers. If you’re slow, 1″ is one inch, which is about two fingers width. Now some peppers will float, just don’t feel sorry for them. Close the lid and put them somewhere where you will forget about them for a few month or so.

IMPORTANT: When you remove
the cover to stir the mixture, do not put your face directly over the
container, you might die. The fumes coming from the peppers are very hot! Enjoy.

Ingredients:

1 cup of well water.
1/3 cup of available vinegar. Cedar or red wine is best.
7 habanero peppers that turned yellow after harvest.
1 tsp. of paparika for drama
1 tsp. of cumin if ya got it.
salt to taste.

Kind of mince them habaneros unless you are high end and have a food processor. Dump that mess into a pot with all the other ingredients and bring to a boil. Leave the trailer while it’s boiling for at least 8 minutes. After you’re done smoking turn off the heat and let the concoction sit until it gets to the temperature of your trailer. Put in a recycled jelly jar and give to your least favorite neighbor or family member. All the rest you can sell to your favorite rich Mexican.

Cream sauce:
2 Tbsp. butter
2 Tbsp. flour
1 cup milk
1/2 lb. government cheese

Boil water, salt, sugar, and butter. Add cabbage. Cook until tender,
about 20 minutes. Add rice on top of cabbage and cook till tender.
Place all of the above in a 9×13 baking dish and cover with cream
sauce. Bake 30-40 minutes till lightly brown. Add buttered bread
crumbs the last 15 minutes. Bake in oven at 400 degrees for 10 minutes
and 300 degrees the last 30 minutes.

Blend all ingredients at medium speed. Cover and
refrigerate.

Combine ingredients and heat until cheeses are melted.
Transfer to a chafing dish. Serve with chunks of bread.

Mix all together and refrigerate until ready to use. Take 1 large round loaf of
rye bread and scoop out center. Put dip in the center. Use the leftover bread
pieces for dipping. A party favorite!

Mix all the ingredients well. Store in a cold place. will keep for weeks
if sealed in a container. I would recommend any number ofsecurity systems to keep this recipe from falling into the hands of the untrained skunk skinners. If the skunk is improperly skinned it is possible to destroy the meat with the musk. If the skunk is improperly killed it could soil it’s own fur and then taint the meat when you skin it and make you quite stinky as well.

First empty the ketchup packets into a small sauce pan. Then place the Ramen in a bowl of hot tap water. remember to let the sit for at least ten minutes or they will be like eating HDMIcables. Once you have heated the ketchup stain it through the dirty sweat sock. If you prefer more of a garlic flavor repeat this two or three times. Then pour half of the hot tap water that your Ramen is soaking in though it over your sauce pan and wring it out into your sauce. Add your backyard spice like weeds and reduce. Pour over the noodles and enjoy.

Place pigs feet in boiling water to cover. Add the red pepper and cook
until meat is almost tender. If you like it falling off the bone, then cook
till tender. Thoroughly wash the greens, cutting off tough stems, and add
to the pot. Let cook gently for another 1-2 hours. When done, season to
taste with salt and pepper. Drain, reserving the liquid. Remove the pigs
feet to plate and surround with the greens. Serve with corn bread and cups
of the “pot likker”(the reserved cooking liquid) for dunking. After eating this at my family reunion, I had to take three Vegas vacations, get married twice, and drink myself blind to forget that the food is why I don’t go to my family reunions.

Take five pound of back strap, place it in a roasting pan. Much like the kind you would use for a turkey.

You will need:

2 tbsp of ground black pepper.

2 tbsp of crushed red pepper.

3 tbsp of non iodized salt

4 tbsp of rubbed sage

2 large cloves of garlic minced.

6 large carrots

4 celery stalks chopped.

4 large baking potatoes chunked., Or you can use several small new potatoes whole.

1 cup of water.

1/2 can of beer.

Mix the salt,peppers, and sage together and rub them into the meat. Place the meat into the center of the roasting pan. Sprinkle the garlic over the top of the meat. Then put the vegetables around the meat. Pour in the water and beer. Be careful not to pour it over the seasoned meat. Preheat the oven to 275 degrees. Cover the pan and place in the oven. Let it cook covered for two hours. Then uncover and turn the heat up to 450 degrees and cook for another 20 minutes. Now you are ready to eat.

Place milk in a deep bowl, add pepper flakes and rosemary. Season meat with
black and cayenne peppers. Place meat in the bowl, add milk as needed to cover.
Let marinate 3-4 hours. Remove meat from marinade, discard marinade. Pat the
meat dry. Re-season the meat, if desired, with black and red peppers. Add salt
to taste, if desired. Brush meat with olive oil to reduce sticking, and grill
over hot coals, or over medium heat in a gas grill for about 10 minutes each
side, brushing with oil again when turning.

1 tsp of basil
11/2 tsp of oregano
1/2 tsp of salt
1 tsp of pepper
1 can of tomato paste
1/2 can of tomato sauce
3/4 of a lb parmsion cheese
10 oz of dandelion greens

Mix together the tomato paste and sauce with the spices. Simmer for ten minutes. Then remove from the heat. Place the Opossum on a shallow cake pan ten onto a sheet of aluminum. Put the sauce on the meat, place the cheese on top. cover with the foil and cook at 275 degrees for two hours. Remove from the oven and top with more cheese. Place it back in the oven uncovered on high until the cheese turns a golden brown. Garnish with dandelion greens and serve.

Place the crow breasts in a bowl add the lemon juice and stir to coat and then allow to soak (imparts a lovely citrus flavour).
While the lemon is soaking in finely chop the Garlic, Green chillies, Fresh coriander leaf and Fresh mint leaf, add to the yogurt you only need enough to cover the breasts easily (add as much of the herbs to your preferred taste).
Stir in the yogurt mix with the crow breasts – make sure all parts are covered.
Cover the bowl and put in the fridge for at least an hour (can be made the night before) – turn over a couple times during the marinade.
Place the breasts separately on a baking tray with as much of the marinade as possible left on them, I cook them for about 20mins (or until they look right) at gas mark 6. If you have a lot of fatties for dinner you can hide a weight loss pill under the crispy skin of each bird.

First you will need to collect the peanut shells from the floor. then you will need to get the olives and cocktail onions from the empty martini glasses. don’t forget the lemons and limes from the lipstick stained margarita glasses. Of course, you must remember the popcorn and pretzels. For desert you will ned the cherries and the spearmint gum from under the stool you were almost falling off of.

Take the popcorn and pretzels and ask the bartender to place them in a blender with two ice cubes and blend well. Don’t forget to give them your last thirty cents in pennies. Place the mixture in a couple empty plastic beer cups you’ve retrieved from the trash. Finely chop the onions and olives with a used spork found on the bathroom floor. Stir it in the mix. Save back the cherries in the snot filled napkin on the bar. Compact it all in the cups and stretch the gum over the open end so it doesn’t dry out on the long one eyed drive home. Over turn the cups and and tap out the cakes and top with the cherries and enjoy your early morning bar cakes.

First take one cup of all purpose flour, and one cup of corn meal.

Then you will need some spices.
1 tbsp of dill
1 tbsp of salt
1 tsp of garlic powder
1 tsp of onion powder
1/2 tsp of mustard seed
1 tsp of crush black pepper corn
1 12oz can of beer
1/8 cup of milk

Combine all of the dry ingredients and mix well. Save back a small amount of the flour to dredge your fish through before placing it in the batter. Mix in the beer and milk. Blend well. NOw your ready to batter the fish. Drop the fish into oil that you have heated to 350 degrees. Cook until a golden brown. Serve and eat.

Pour 4 litres of juice into a sterilized container.
Add 1 tsp. of yeast to a small glass of warm water stir and leave till it goes frothy.
Add frothy yeast to apple juice.

PLACE cap on top of container after 1 to 2 days top up with last carton of juice.
After it has stopped bubbling (6 to 7 days) put it into the fridge.
Remember the clearer it gets the better it tastes.
You could drink it as soon as you can see through it but best to wait till its very clear.

1 cup (or more!) of milk chocolate chips (you can also use white chocolate chips)

Spray a 9×13 brownie pan
Sort of crunch up the corn chips while they’re still in the bag, and spread them evenly over the bottom of the brownie pan.
In a medium saucepan, bring the sugar and the karo to a boil over medium heat, just so the sugar is dissolved. Remove from heat and stir in the peanut butter until smooth. Pour over the fritos in the pan.
You could just sprinkle the chocolate chips over the top of the warm fritos and peanut butter mixture, and let them melt, but I melt the chips in the microwave and pour the chocolate over the top.
Cut into bars and wrap individually.

* 5 – 6 pigeons
* seasoning
* 8 oz st4ewing steak
* a little good gravy
* 8 oz short pastry

Method

Cut the birds into 4 joints: 2 breasts and 2 leg joints. Put the remainder of the carcasses, with a small onion and carrot, to stew in a little water. This stock can be made into gravy to eat with the pie.

Line the pie dish with slices of steak about 2 inches long and 1 inch across,Be sure to choose a good cut of meat so as not to have it become as tough as the souls of my MBT shoes. Then lay the pigeons on top, cover with water and season well. Cover with greaseproof paper, and simmer in medium over for 1-2 hours. Remove dish and cover with pie crust. Glaze top with beaten egg, return to hot oven and bake until golden brown. Fill up with gravy when the pie is opened.

Pigeon Pie (serves 4)

Ingredients

* 3 pigeon breasts
* 1 – 2 rashers bacon
* ½ lb stewing steak, cut into small pieces
* 1 sliced hard boiled egg
* 1 dessertspoon flour
* stock
* 1 teaspoon salt
* ½ lb flaky or short pastry
* ½ teaspoon pepper
* egg and milk to glaze
* 1 teaspoon chopped parsley

Method

Cut pigeon breasts into 4, right through the bones. Dip each piece of pigeon and steak into seasoned flour and arrange in a pie dish. Add parsley, diced bacon, hard boiled egg and sufficient stock to about half fill the dish. Cover with pastry, decorate and glaze. Bake at first in a hot oven until pastry is browned, then lower temperature and cook for about 2 hours until the pigeons are tender.

Protect pastry with greaseproof covering if necessary, to prevent over browning.

When the pie is cooked, fill up with the remainder of stock.

1 small box of no sugar orange jello
1 small box of no sugar white chocolate pudding
1 regular no fat container of Cool Whip

With orange jello, put into a bowl and add 1 cup boiling water. Stir to dissolve. Add 1 cup of cold water and mix well. Let it set for 5 minutes.
Then add the no sugar white chocolate pudding and mix it well to dissolve the pudding. Then fold in the cool whip. Put it into a larger container or into 6 small plastic cup containers. It’s only something like 25 calories so you don’t even have to bother taking those diet pills today. You could also try different flavors of jello.

1 12oz coffeemate creamer
4 pack vanilla pudding
2 lemons
20 vanilla wafers
4 tbs butter

Crush wafers real fine and add melted butter. Pat it down real good to make the crust.

In a separate dish or bedpan, spoon in the pudding, then squeeze in the lemons and stir into the pudding. Add the remainder a little at a time. Stir well each time you add the creamer to the mixture.. Stir in enough to make it thick which is about 9 oz of the powdered creamer. Pour the pudding mix on top of the crust.
Uncle Jimmy said he would chill it by placing the dish on an ice machine and have someone keep eye on it for about 45 minutes, but it’s ok even if it’s not chilled. When my uncle Jimmy got out of drug rehabt we had a big party behind our trailer and my grandma make aboout 5 of these cheesecakes. Unfortunately my uncle Jimmy relapsed after watching grandma sprinkle the powdered creamer into the pudding mixture.

Brown ground beef and drain. Combine cheese and ground beef and mix together. Place the crescent rolls in a circle by separating into triangles in a circle. Pull corners of crescent over top of the ground beef. Bake at 425 degrees till golden brown. Garnish with tomatoes, lettuce, and sour cream.

Throw everything together in a pot over medium heat, stirring often. You may have to add water if the sauce is too thick.

Cheap Chicken Broth (or just make it out of bouillon cubes and water)
Can of Refried Beans
Can of tomatoes/chilis

Do not make this in your microwave unless you want a disgusting mess. Open cans and dump into a pot then heat and season to taste. Maybe serve with stale crackers or leftover taco shells. You can make huge batches of this stuff and freeze in ziplock bags…that way when your fat momma gets hungry she don’t have to wait for you to open up those three tin cans. Enjoy.

1 can of Spam(shaved or cut matchstick thin)
Day old hoagie rolls from the local bakery. They are cheaper.
1/2lb. of government cheese.

Fry up your shaved spam. Meanwhile heat your hoagie rolls up in the microwave until they are soft. Melt the cheese in a bowl until it’s the consistency of a think soup. Now cut your hoagie in half and stuff it with the shaved Spam. Top that with your cheese. It’s not a Philly, it’s a cheap compromise. Yummy!

Mix butter and seasonings together. Brush mixture on corn. Wrap corn with
foil, place on grill. Turn corn after 6 mins. Cook an additional 6 mins.
Remove corn from foil place directly on grill each side until brown about
2-3 mins. Remove corn and serve

For the cake:
Go out in the backyard and grab ya 6 robin eggs.(which is the equivalent to 2 store bought)
One box of Martha White Cake Mix
Left over beer from last nights party
1 1/3 cups of cooking oil

For the frosting:
Three slices of left over cold pizza
2 cups of powdered sugar
1 Tablespoon margarine

Combine cake mix with the robin eggs, instead of water or milk use one cup of last nights party beer and the cooking oil. Go to the garage and rummage through your favorite air tools and find a grinding tool or air drill rinse it off and blend ingredients for two minutes. Follow the cooking instructions on the box. While the cake is in the oven make the frosting. Take a pair of scissors and cut the pizza into small pieces. Place them into a mixing bowl with the powdered sugar and margarine. Blend until creamy smooth. When the cake is cool spread the frosting liberally, garnish with Fritos and serve.

1 1/4 cup shredded frozen hash browns
2/3 cup shredded or grated carrot
1/4 cup chopped onion
2 teaspoons oil
Pinch of salt and pepper (optional)
2 large eggs
1/2 cups egg substitute
1/4 cup low-fat milk or fat-free half-and-half
1/8 teaspoon dry mustard
Two dashes hot pepper sauce (like Tabasco)
1/2 cup shredded reduced-fat sharp cheddar cheese

In a microwave-safe 1-quart casserole dish, combine potatoes, carrot,
onion, and oil. Cover and microwave on HIGH for 3 minutes,
stirring after 90 seconds. Add salt and pepper, if desired. In mixing
bowl, combine eggs, milk, mustard, and hot pepper sauce by
beating on medium speed for a minute or two. Pour egg mixture into
casserole dish and stir to combine with potato mixture. Cover dish (waxed
paper will work) and microwave on HIGH for 2 minutes. Draw cooked egg
toward the middle of dish and the liquid egg toward the edges and
microwave on HIGH for 2 minutes more. Sprinkle cheese on top, and
microwave until cheese is melted (about 30 seconds more). Let stand a few
minutes before serving.

Early in the day, in small bowl, with a fork
or wire whisk, mix one 8-ounce container of sour cream, 1 tablespoon
chili powder, 2 tablespoons chopped fresh cilantro, and 1/2 teaspoon salt.
Makes about 1 cup. Whatever you do, do not mistake this mixture with your cool acne cream. I have done this before and ended up completely submerging my face into my toilet bowl to get the pain and inflamation to stop. Enjoy!

1 cup poppy seed
1 cup Milk
1 cup granulated white sugar
1/4 cup butter (softened)
1 egg (beaten)
1 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
2 tsp. baking powder
1 tsp. vanilla

Soak the poppy seed in the milk overnight in the refrigerator.

The following day – Cream well the sugar and butter. Add beaten egg.

Sift together flour and baking power. Add to creamed mixture. Then
gradually add vanilla. Mix in the soaked poppy seed mixture. Bake in
loaf or flat pan in moderate oven at 350 degrees for about 40 minutes.

1 Can o Spam cubed into 1/2″ chunks

Skillet fry spam alone.

Add desired salsa to warm.

1/2 diced jalepinio

Slap on a 12″ soft shell taco

top with shredded cheese of choice nuke for 1 min to melt cheese and heat shell.

1 Dallop sour cream over top

1/4 Head cabbage

3 Carrots, washed and peeled

1 cn (8oz) crushed pineapple,

Drained 1 cn (11oz) mandarin orange

Prepare jello according to directions on box. Refrigerate 2 1/2 hours or until partially set. Grate about half a cup cabbage and half a cup carrots into a bowl. Add the drained pineapple and orange segments to the vegetables and mash with a fork until mixture looks well chewed. Remove the jello and dump the vegetables in. Stir gently with a fork. Cover with plastic wrap and chill 2-4 hours until it has the consistency of a grassy pile of gelatinous puke. For those guests that have a weak stomach you may want to offer up some health insurance quotes as an hors-devor. If you wish you can serve this with a chilled glass of Pepto-bismal instead of pink champagne.

Mix strawberry Jell-O, gelatine and 2 cups hot water. Add 2 cups cold water; slowly mix in can of sweetened condensed milk. Chill for 4 hours.You may wish to make your Jell-O soup a little more substantial. If so, you may wish to add some mushrooms and jalapeno peppers. If you like greens you should use the lime Jell-O and add collards, carrots, and broccoli. The lime Jello-O is also good for those of you that like fish in your soup. Just remember Jell-O soup will stain. I ruined a couple of my favorite company logo shirts while slopping through bowls of Jell-O soup.

3/4 C veg. shortening
3/4 C. sugar
3 eggs
3 3/4 C. flour
3 tblsp. baking powder
1/2 C. preserves
1 egg yolk, beaten w/2 tblsp. light cream

Oven @ 350°F

Cream shortening and sugar. beat in one egg at a time. Sift together flour and baking powder, stir into shortening mix to make a soft dough. Chill for 1 hour. Turn dough onto a floured surface and roll out 12 rectangles-each 8×12″. Spread about a tblsp. of preserves over 1/2 of each rectangle-staying well within the edges. Fold dough over the preserves and trim the edges or crimp to close. Place tarts on a greased cookie sheet and brush w/the egg yolk cream mix. Bake for 20 minutes.

Frosting:

1/2 C. 10x sugar
1/2 tsp. vanilla extract
2 tbsp. milk

Stir the vanilla and milk into powdered sugar until you have a thin frosting. Dribble onto each tart or brush w/ pastry brush.

Wrap in foil, and store in fridge. These will keep a week or so in fridge, or can freeze 3-4 months.

To toast:

2 minutes if refrigerated, 4 minutes if frozen. I like to eat my pop tarts while I am watching the morning news on my pop up tv in the bathroom. The toilet tank is a perfect prop for my toaster and a glass of milk.

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It is important to remember that eating rich food like this can cause serious weight gain. If you do put on a few extra pounds you should check out an Apidexin reviews.
DIRECTIONS

1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C). Grease a 1 1/2 quart baking dish.
2. Heat a skillet over medium-high heat. Fry the bologna slices in the hot skillet until browned on both sides, about 1 minute per side. Drain on a paper towel-lined plate. Wipe excess grease from the skillet, reduce heat to medium, and stir in the butter and onion. Cook and stir until the onion has softened and turned translucent, about 5 minutes. Stir the onions into the warm mashed potatoes.
3. Spread half of the mashed potatoes into the prepared baking dish. Layer with half of the fried bologna, and sprinkle with half of the cheese. Repeat with the remaining ingredients.
4. Bake uncovered in the preheated oven until the cheese is bubbly, and the center is hot, about 30 minutes.

INGREDIENTS

4 to 6 chicken breast, cooked and cut up
1 can cream chicken soup
4 boiled eggs, chopped
1 onion, chopped
1/4 c. mayonnaise
1/4 to 1/2 c. celery, chopped
Crushed cheetos for topping

DIRECTIONS

1) Mix above ingredients together and put in long casserole dish.
2) Crush enough cheetos to cover top.
3) Bake in 350 degree oven for 30 minutes.

Bring the sugar, butter or margarine and syrup to a boil for 5 minutes. Remove from fire. Add baking soda. Stir. Pour over Cheetos in large bowl. Toss and spread on 10×15 buttered pan. Bake at 250 degrees F. for 1 hour, stirring every 15 minutes. Pour out on waxed paper rubbed with additional butter or cooking spray. Quickly separate the Caramelized Cheetos™ pieces and try not to give into temptation!

I served this to my husband. After he finished, he was so hyper he ran around the house and broke two chairs and a table lamp.

* marshmallow
* cheeto
* popcorn
* chocolate chip

Directions:
Finely chop marshmallow,popcorn and chocolate chip and combine with 1-half cup of water in a large mixing bowl. Stir the ingredients into a paste-like consistency, then form into balls (or similar shapes) about 1 inch in diameter.

Pulverize cheeto and put in a medium sized paper bag. Put the balls into the paper bag, 5 to 7 at a time, and shake until the balls are thoroughly covered. Arrange the balls on a baking sheet and bake at 350 for 45 minutes. Serve with any condiment that you have available.

Serves 6

to find out what there workers would like to eat. Most of them were fairly picky. I finally found one that would be satisfied with my Scrapple casserole. Not is it the only thing I know how to make, but it is the only thing I can afford to make. It is a simple recipe. Start with one pound of Scapple. Mix it with as much stale bread as you need to get rid of. Boil three cups of macaroni. Now take one quarter of the Scapple bread mix and press it into the bottom of a casserole dish. Then layer in one cup of macaroni. Continue alternating Scapple, macaroni, Scapple, macaroni, Scrapple. Then top it off with the cheese you have found in the back of the fridge, scraped the mold off, and shredded. Removal of the mold is optional. Bake in the oven at three-hundred seventy-five degrees for forty-five minutes. Cut into Sqareish shaped pieces and serve.

Directions:

Heat oven to 400ºF. Spray 12×8-inch (2-quart) glass baking dish with nonstick cooking spray. Prepare potatoes as directed on package for oven in sprayed baking dish, using water, milk and margarine. Sprinkle potatoes with peas.

Bake at 40ºF. for 15 minutes. Arrange fish sticks over peas and potatoes. Bake an additional 20 to 25 minutes or until potatoes are tender.

This recipe for Fish Stick Casserole serves/makes 4

Ingredients
1 carton (8 oz. ) sour cream
1 tablespoon Taco seasoning mix
1 package (18-30 count) crunchy fish sticks
1 box (12 count) taco shells, heated
2 cups Shredded lettuce
1 Large tomato, diced

Preparation

1. Combine sour cream and taco seasoning.

2. Bake fish sticks according to package directions.

3. Fill taco shells with taco-seasoned sour cream, lettuce, 2-3 baked fish sticks, tomatoes, or any other desired toppings.
Cook’s Notes

Other optional toppings can be shredded cheddar cheese, salsa, onions, avocados, olives, peppers, or anything else you like in tacos!

18 Fish Sticks
6 English muffins – halved
1 cup pizza or tomato sauce
2 cups shredded mozzarella cheese

Directions
Bake Fish Sticks according to packaging. While baking, toast the English muffins until golden brown. Once the English muffins are toasted, spread 1 tablespoon of sauce on each muffin half. Cut the sticks or fries into bite size pieces (about 2 – 3 pieces per stick) and place 4 – 6 pieces on top of sauced English muffin. Sprinkle mozzarella cheese on top and place English muffin pizzas in a shallow metal baking pan. Place pizzas in oven and bake until cheese is melted. Once cheese is melted, remove from oven and serve.

1 package (12 oz) frozen, shredded hash brown potatoes, thawed
4 eggs
2 cups milk
1 Tbsp. dried minced onion
1 Tbsp. dill weed
1 1/4 tsp. seasoned salt
1/8 tsp. pepper
1 cup of government cheese
1 package (12 oz) frozen fish sticks (about 18)

Break apart hash browns with a fork; set aside. In a large bowl, beat eggs and milk. Add onion, dill, seasoned salt and pepper. Stir in hash browns and cheese. Transfer to a greased 11×7x2″ baking dish; arrange fish sticks over the top. Bake, uncovered, at 350°F for 50 miniutes or until top is golden brown and fish flakes with a fork. Let stand for 5 minutes before cutting.

Sauce:
2 tb A-1 Sauce
2 tb Worchestershire Sauce
3 tb Ketchup
2 tb Vegetable Oil
1 ts Soy Sauce
1 ts Liquid Smoke
2 tb Water

Mix ground beef with all other ingredients, stir until mixed. Put into a food processor with chopping knife and chop for a good minute, until well-mixed together and consistency of putty.

On a floured cutting board, take ball of meat mixture and coat both sides lightly with flour so it won’t stick and roll out with floured rolling pin, or smash flat with irons, then fold and roll until roughly 8″ by 12″ rectangle 1/8″ or less thick.

Using a pizza cutter, cut into 1″ wide strips 8″ long and carefully transfer to a wire rack. <

Heat oven to 300 F, place wire rack with meat in oven on oven rack in center of oven, with second oven rack one notch below. On lower rack, place cookie sheet under meat to act as a drip pan.

Bake for 1 hour at 300 F.

Mix together sauce ingredients in shallow dish. Remove rack of meat, roll each strip into sauce mix and return to rack. When all coated, return to oven and increase temp. to 450 F. Bake for 15 min.

Remove rack again and recoat strips and return to oven for another 15 min. or until strips become almost burnt around edges.

Remove from oven and coat one last time, then let sit and cool to room temp.

Plucking the feathers on a Pigeon is like trying to pluck ostrich feathers on a live bird, so you can simply used skinned pigeons in this recipe if you prefer. However I prefer them dressed with skin. Blanche the pigeons in boiling water for 1 minute. Drain well. Pour out water return pigeon to saucepan. Add all ingredients except oil and add water to cover. Bring to the boil and simmer for 1 1/4hrs. Drain well Brush with oil and serve with salad. Lovely